Consider my friends, if you would for a bit
A debate in which you will have to admit
Disagreements abound and tempers get frayed
What's the greatest invention that ever was made?

Some say the computer, the wheel it's been said.
Then there's the airplane, or even sliced bread
No! The greatest invention as I now will reveal
Was Mr. bombardier's 12 Elan snowmobile.

Light as a feather and strong as an ox
You can run her 'cross gravel, on sand or on rocks!
Simple to fix if she ever breaks down
If you got snare wire and bubblegum lying around.

Able to haul a mountain of wood
or even a mountain from where it was stood
Sure you don't think Mt. Peyton always was there
Sure I hauled that there on a dare, for a beer!

And you've seen those young fellows out skipping on water
The 12 will do that, though I usually don't bother
Till me and the Missus are sick of the slush
And the cold and the snow and then Sheila's brush!

It's then that she'll say "get me out of this fast!"
So we hop on the 12 and I give her the gas
"Where to my ducky?" 'Tis then I will say
As we're hitting mach 1 'cross St. Mary's bay.

"Go south" she will say "'til I tells you to stop"
As we pass Nova Scotia, just touching the lop.
Down the U.S. eastern seaboard yes indeed
And then across Florida, to pick up some speed.

Then back on the water to a nice sunny island
And an hour from home we're back on the dry land
Lead back on the beach with the snowsuit hove off
With some tropical drinks and a tropical scoff.

"So what's the big deal?" you say right off the bat
"Everyone knows a 12 will do that."
Well there's one trip I took about 40 years back
You might not believe but I'll swear on a stack

Of bibles it's true, not a word of a lie
I wouldn't stretch things, I'm not that kind of guy.
I was out on the 12 for a few sticks of wood
And not finding much, not doing very good.

There was nothing but scroff right to the horizon
I'm telling you b'ys I was just about poisoned
Then I saw a new place a little ways off
Thought I'd look for wood there, gassed up and took off.

Well it turned out the new spot was even worse!
"Abitibi's been here!" I let out the curse.
"Guess I'll boil the kettle, have a lunch and some tea
Then go home with the Missus and watch Land and Sea.

Just at that moment a Skidoo came along
Some size of a machine but something was wrong
A hard-looking rig and a rough-looking ride
Then a hatch opened up and a man stepped outside.

Well he never said much, he just looked all around
Then finally he moved, put one foot on the ground
And spoke up the words that he had on his mind
"One small step for man, a big leap for mankind."

"Yes b'y, says I, but no firewood see
I'd say Kreuger's been here, want a cup of tea?"
Well he hadn't seen me and he got quite a fright
His name was Armstrong and he was a little uptight.

"We got a problem Houston" he said
As I offered roast capelin and a bit of hard bread
He said "I'm not hungry" and he looked pretty sad.
But he glutched down the last lassie bun that I had!

Then he jumped back into his queer-looking rig
All wimpy and nish, not nearly so big
As before when out of the sky he had dropped
(I passed him going home just like he was stopped!)

Now the 12 is led up and not doing much
I took out the motor, the belt and the clutch
And shipped them to Churchill for a pretty good dime
While the turbines are down for some maintenance time.

Guess it's back to the woods pretty soon cutting vars
'Though NASA wants to know if there's water on Mars.
But I won't be going there anytime soon
If they don't tell the truth 'bout that day on the moon!

So don't mind the computer and don't mind the plane
Don't mind the wheel, they're all pretty lame
The world's greatest invention, as is now revealed
Was Mr. Bombardier's 12 Elan snowmobile.


Sent from my 4Acadia.

  Submitted By: Dave Paddon