Tales From Away ~​’Home’ vs ‘The Mainland’

Even though I was born on the Mainland (Toronto, ON) and moved back home to Newfoundland with my parents at a very young age; I tell anyone who asks, “I have been here 37 too long years now!” It is such an ironic turn of events because 37 years ago I was not sad to be leaving my home in Newfoundland for personal reasons. After six years of living on the Mainland I found myself single again. I was wary to date a Newfoundland man also living here; afraid to have to move back home to Newfoundland once more.

I work, married, and with my Scottish/Irish husband raised a family here on the Mainland. While visiting Newfoundland once a year, or every second year, I felt like I left a little piece of my heart at home each time I visited.

Hearing songs like ‘Eastbound 401’, sung by Eddie Eastman used to hit home every time. I would open the door to my former SUV and say to it “I’m going to drive you all the way to Newfoundland one day, I promise you!”

Writing poems and short stories about my beloved (some may say romanticized) home in Newfoundland, has helped me immensely over the years. My dear deceased Scottish mother-in-law was very homesick when she first moved to Toronto, ON from Faifley, Scotland. I can certainly empathize with her on that, but it happened to me a little later in my journey. My father-in-law had moved from Derry, Ireland as a young working man to Scotland where he met my mother-in-law; so, the move to ON, Canada was not such a momentous change for him. He had a sister and brother-in-law here in Toronto, plus two nieces and a nephew (who visit him regularly to this day).

A friend from home in Newfoundland had said to me years ago, “Why don’t you move home to Newfoundland already?” Easier said than done I’m afraid.

As I enter my soon to be retirement age with the loss of my dear husband, I find myself yearning for home in Newfoundland even more. Do I stay or do I go (?); that is definitely the question. I’m still working and loving my job, plus I have my father-in-law, two wonderful stepsons, two beautiful daughters-in-law, the greatest grandchildren (that I love visiting), our son playing soccer/football in Scotland with another beautiful daughter in law who come back to Toronto periodically; how can I leave them permanently?!

I will most definitely visit more often, but I don’t know if I can fully move ‘home’ to Newfoundland. I am sure I am not the only one (Newfoundlander living on the Mainland) who has this perplexedly; but all I can do is take things one day at a time, one week at a time, one month at a time and one year at a time!

~Godspeed

Celeste Delaney-Loughrey

Ajax, ON (formerly of Conception Bay North, NL)