by Lyndon Regular

Retirement…huh?

It’s a bunch of words and phrases better kept in a comedian’s pocket then shared with a retired guy.  Things like; relax, keep busy, slow down, take her easy b’y, mind your back, you want to do what?, he is having a mid-life crisis I tell ya, you want to buy a new car?, dad, you deserve to rest cause you worked hard enough all your life.  On that last note you would think the kids would want you to burn out to get the inheritance sooner. One guy says “Retirement = Appointment”. I am not sure he will get a “A” from the teacher for poetry, but there is an awful truth to that thought for many of us joining the ranks of the golden club. By the way, aren’t we all still waiting for the gold? And don’t get me started about watching TV, that joy loses its appeal quickly unless you like the torture of watching the Leafs. You know who you are! I will avoid the joke about them social distancing themselves from the cup for almost 60 years. Oops.

Don’t even look up the word retirement on the web dictionary for synonyms.  You will go running for the hills. At a minimum you will be dismayed when the dreaded word is used as an example and I quote: “Safety, after all, is a key part of truly enjoying retirement”.  This person thinks we all need a rocking chair on the porch. Or, “For some seniors retirement is a prime time to start a business”. This may be true, but the author has never run a business, and have we not worked enough after 40 plus years.  But the best is this one: “The wave of retirements by younger boomers is likely to reshape the economy”. Sherlock Holmes would be proud.  The shape we are concerned about, is it pear or hourglass? Or do I need to buy suspenders to keep my pants up?

All that being said, retirement is a tricky time for us all. We go from full bore at one hundred percent maximum throttle to wow!, I have choices, really I do!  Sometimes we long for the good ol days where our cells, and emails were blowing up with demands and people craving our attention mostly to solve their problems. We coached hockey, helped out in the community, cut wood for a neighbour, fiddled with tools and engines. We were busy and loved it more than we hated it. Our path was set! And then we retire…

Being the baby of the group of friends and coworkers, I have watched some ease into retirement with the dancing grace of Fred Astaire while others take a little longer to sort out their place amongst the living work-a-day zombies and now very busy kids and grand kids. We can’t even complain to our politicians about things that have bothered us for the last twenty years now that we have time to ruminate on them. Has anyone been called a grumpy old man? Just asking.

For starters, there is P who has not slowed down one bit with his hobbies, family gatherings, adventures, volunteering and on and on. Happy and fulfilled. Another friend, D, has gone from one hundred miles per hour running all over the world, keeping up two homes, volunteering and then going to almost zero overnight, but after a year of adjustment has declared some things around the house can wait until tomorrow. Still busy, but is shifting to prioritize himself to do a little more of what he wants. Yes, another fellow reborn!

Why is retirement not like a rebirth for all of us?  Do new things, take a new road, explore a new opportunity, travel if possible, volunteer.  We always associated our jobs with who we are and that has been scientifically proven. Why are we afraid to admit we are retired? Or we say it but them follow up with how busy we are to justify the oxygen we are using.

Some people tell you to have a purpose in retirement. I have found a new word…"relevance”. That is what we all really want isn’t it?  It may be the hardest thing  to achieve. We may not be at the top of the curve but can be truly relevant. Sometimes we just have to remind folks we still matter. Sometimes we have to remind ourselves that  “I exist; therefore, I am…relevant!”

Retirement is not so bad. I think I will go for a nap. After all, the grandkids are coming over soon and I better be at my best to be relevant, especially to them. That is what really matters!

Lyndon

PS…To our significant others, thank you for your patience, we will figure it out. The dog will get fed and the leaky faucet fixed. After my nap.